another day

I was told there was a difference between jobless and unemployed.. quoting from my grand-aunt (who was protecting me from all the bombarding qns of my bum-status); being jobless is a personal choice, unemployed is being rejected by others.. such scrutiny of word choice comes to play when its time to be defensive.. when.. CHINESE NEW YEAR!! when everyone u know or hardly know starts to want to know abt u more on that very day.. gosh.. wat a stress time.. its great if u are the cream of the pack.. enjoy the glory and praises.. but if its the other story.. then...
being made to compare to others is wat i cant stand.. but then again.. dont i always do it too? like the selection of clothes, bags etc when i go shoppin.. hmm.. mayb its time to give those non-living things abit of feelings too.. i guess its my ego that i cant stand being put into comparison here.. who likes critictism and hates praises?? regardless of the motive behind every praise.. it still feels good..
being jobless is making me think maybe abit more than i actually used to; esply in sch.. nv knew i could analysis so much and crap so much 'logics' out too.. what do i want actually?? that i still cant figure out though.. suddenly lost without an objective made me aimless and lost.. i cant really undersatnd why i snet out my resumes then at the same time reject the offers opened to me.. many claim that i',m lucky to have great breaks in big places (eg mediacorp, sph) but eventually backin out.. i, too, cant understand really y.. am i tooo comfy? or becox i know i can still live off my parents' funds.. selfish..
fracturing an ankle made me dependent on crutches for abt 2 weeks... being armed w a degree made me crippled to face reality.. i have a huge comfort zone which i mux break free.. or i cannnot grow..
JENNIFER... hello..