Honesty is the best policy? why my stumble..

I've questioned myself many times if i am blunt, honest or just plain ignorant and took the defensive move of not admitting to my ignorance and claim that im blunt. have i been the most honest abt things? or have i been hiding behind this facade that i-know-alot-of-things?
things range from my true feelings and about managing others feelings.. which ones comes first? do we not live for ourselves but no man is an island and i do live alot because of relationships. yet, i am not the most successful in maintaining or prolonging them. for every failed one or discontinued one, i have felt the impacts. i have been hurt but i chose to ignore the effects. am i oblivious to such effects or do i learn to live through them. memories have haunted me so many times, tears were close but never shed.
my admiration goes to those who can express and finally move on. have i stayed stagnant in the past while time goes pass me mercilessly? it did take 50 yrs for even Jodie Foster who has so much success ever since the age of 3 to come out and be daring to the world that gave her that fame. im a nobody yet, i have no courage to do anything really honest. many have moved on and started chapters.. am i just trying to rewrite them?
i am a product of norms. my pain, it seems, might go with me to the grave. must i be constantly bugged and saddened by them?! Direction.. guides.. in search...